How to deal with Anniversaries!

Good morning everyone and welcome to this weeks Midweek Wednesday Blog by myself.


Today I want to talk to you about something different as yesterday was a difficult day for me in many ways, following into September and the first week of October as well.


As you all know by now I'm a single parent, carer and a full time business owner and generally always have my stuff together to allow for those random off days we all get.


Yesterday was a significant day for me as it's my Dad's birthday, for those who know me will no that my dad past away 10 years ago (on 18th September) and even 10 years on it still doesn't make the birthday or anniversaries any easier.



I have included a pic of my dad (left) before he got ill. He was the most genuine guy I've ever known in my life. He was always the one to push me forward telling me to go for it. Whereas my mum was the one who always told me plan everything and if I don't plan it don't go for it. So both my parents were always supportive of anything I wanted to do in life.


With this being said there are times still now 10 years down the line I sit and think what would dad of told me to do. and also after 6 years (on 24th September) what would mum tell me to do.


So when you think about things in that sense you know they are always by your side being the supportive parents that were in this world as well.


I sit there at times and just think to myself ok i don't have them in person but they are still there and some of the time if I'm sat quiet 2 pigeons will appear in the garden or near by roof tops. For me that is my sign they are there still and will give me the answer i need.


But this still doesn't make Birthdays and anniversaries any easier. So how do I cope with these special days and moments. Sometimes it's really hard to actually handle these occasions but other times i just get up take a moment have a little cry if needed and then continue with my day. My daughter always picks up on when "mummy isn't right" so I need to make these days as natural as I can for her sake. I'm not the sort of person to go to their graves as sit with them as I truly believe it doesn't matter where I am if I need a moment I know they are there. But if i do need something to connect me i just look at these 2 pics below and it reminds me of where there body is and there spirit lives on.


My daughter is a constant reminder for me that I need to keep going as one day I will need to fully explain to her about her grandparents. Prior to having my daughter I will admit i was ready to give up and go to be back with my parents, they sent me a sign after 13 years of being told i couldn't have kids i found myself pregnant a year after my mum passed. This was my sign from them that there's still a lot of fight left in me yet and she was brought to me to be the reminder i need when days, weeks or months get tough.


As the saying goes "Time is a Healer" in my experience no it's not, "Time makes it that little bit easier to cope and deal with it". I don't think no matter how much time goes by you're ever ok when you've lost the people who have brought you up whether its parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles or adopted parents. You just learn how to handle things and that it is ok to carry on and still live the best life you can.


"You only get one life, Live it"

I have lots of pictures of me and my mum but I don't have many of me and my dad and that was one lesson I was taught massively when I lost my dad was t